Thursday, December 31, 2009

SHOPPING EXERCISE 1 BY HAFJAK DIVIZ



ONE OF MY FAVORITE EXERCISES
IS PERFORMED WHEN IM IN A STORE WITH MY KIDS

WE WALK IN HOLDING HANDS
THEN WE SEE
THERES SO MUCH TO WANT AND BUY
WE LET GO OF EACH OTHER
AND STARE AT ALL THE STUFF

WE SUCCUMB TO THE WANT
START GRABBING THINGS OFF SHELVES
STACK THEM IN OUR HANDS
CLUTCH STACKS TO BODIES

A PILE OF DVDS AT 15 TO 25 DOLLARS EACH
A SET OF ACTION FIGURES AT 10 DOLLARS EACH
VIDEOGAMES AT 15 DOLLARS EACH

WE OBSERVE BIG TICKET ITEMS
HUGE PLASTIC DEVICES
LOOKING SO CHEAPLY MADE
AND COSTING SO MUCH

WE REMEMBER THEIR PRICES
AND MENTALLY PLACE THEM ON OUR STACKS

WHEN WERE DONE GRABBING AND STACKING
WE START ADDING
ADD EVERYTHING UP
COME UP WITH A GRAND TOTAL FOR ALL OUR STACKS

700 DOLLARS

THIS TOTAL IS THE CLIMAX OF THE EXERCISE
MAKES EVERYTHING COME INTO FOCUS

700 DOLLARS

WHAT CAN WE DO WITH 700 DOLLARS
WHAT SHOULD WE DO WITH 700 DOLLARS
WHAT ARE THE BEST MEMORIES WE CAN PURCHASE
WITH 700 DOLLARS

ANSWERS COME TO MIND
THE LESSON IS LEARNED
THE EXERCISE IS COMPLETE

WE REVERSE OUR TRIP INTO THE STORE
AS WE WALKED IN GRABBING AND STACKING
WE WALK OUT DROPPING AND RETURNING

BIG TICKET ITEM PRICES ARE FORGOTTEN
STACK ITEMS ARE REPLACED WHERE FOUND ON HOOK AND SHELF

THE REWARD OF THE EXERCISE IS THIS

WE LEAVE THE STORE WITH NOTHING IN OUR HANDS
BUT EACH OTHERS HANDS
NOONE IS WHINING OR COMPLAINING
THAT WERE LEAVING WITH NOTHING
IN FACT
WEVE FORGOTTEN ABOUT EVERYTHING WE WANT
AS SOON AS WE EXIT THE STORE
OUR BACKS TO ITS BEGGING SIGN
OUR FACES SMILING
AS WE LAUGH AND TELL JOKES
WHILE TRAVERSING THE DANGEROUS PARKING LOT


COPYRIGHT 2009 HAFJAK DIVIZ
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED



FROST AND MIKO 28

Thank you for once again tapping into the wellspring of creative publishing that is the Ganerda's Business blog. How many poems does it take to make a book? How many poems can you string together to record an odyssey?

Please enjoy the antics of Frost & Miko, and Happy Happy New Year from all of us at Ganerda's Business! We hope that your 2010 looks as bright and shiny as ours.

Thank you very much for your time and interest,

Ganerda Grul
Librarian and Publisher
www.ganerda.com



...To be continued next week!
www.ganerda.com

ADVENTURES OF THE SPECK 1 A SERIAL POEM BY HAFJAK DIVIZ

ADVENTURES OF THE SPECK 1

THE NAME



WHAT DO YOU GET
WHEN YOU SHRINK A COUCH POTATO

A SPECKTATER

THATS A JOKE
AND SO AM I

MY NAME IS TATE TYNEE
IM A SUPERHERO

THE ONLY THING FUNNIER THAN MY SUPERHERO NAME
IS MY SUPER POWER

I CAN SHRINK
ISNT THAT GREAT
NO SUPER STRENGTH OR FLYING
I SHRINK

I GET DOWN ON MY POWER
BUT ITS LIKE ANYTHING ELSE
IT COMES WITH ITS PROS AND CONS

ONE OF THE CONS IS
HOW DO YOU COME UP WITH A COOL NAME
FOR A SORT OF UNCOOL POWER

WE THOUGHT UP SOME BASIC NAMES
I SAY WE
ILL GET INTO THAT LATER

WE THOUGHT UP SOME BASIC NAMES
NAMES THAT SIMPLY STATED WHAT MY POWER WAS
SIZESHRINKER
SHRINKMAN
TINYMAN
MIDGETMAN
THE DWARF
LITTLE MAN
SMALLMAN

I CAN SHRINK MY BODY
I CANT SHRINK MY EGO
THE BASIC NAMES WERE REJECTED

WE TRIED ANIMAL NAMES
THE ONLY ONE WE CAME UP WITH
WAS INCHWORM

THIS WAS AN APT ALIAS FOR ME
DESCRIBING SEVERAL DIFFERENT ASPECTS OF MY PERSON
TO THIS DAY
SOME REFUSE TO CALL ME ANYTHING BUT INCHWORM
I ACCEPT IT WHEN IM CALLED IT
BUT CONTINUED ON MY QUEST FOR
A FAIR AND BALANCED NAME

IF YOU CANT BE COOL
BE QUIRKY
QUIRKY IS A FORM OF COOL
ITS GEEK COOL
HALF AND HALF
A BIT OF BOTH SIDES
LIKE THE FONZ WEARING GLASSES
OR INDIANA JONES
AS PORTRAYED BY JERRY LEWIS

WE TRIED QUIRKY NAMES
SHRUNKEN ED
SHRINKING VIOLET
TINY TIM
TATER TOT
JOHNNY SMALL
MR SMALLISHNESS
THE DIMINUTOR
ENSMALLINATOR
SHRINKO THE SHRUNK
LITTLE TITS
LITTLE BITS
MR BITS
BITS MCLITTLE
MR MORSEL
MR MOTE
MR MOLECULE
MOLECULO
THE CRUMB
SUPERCRUMB
SPECKTACULA
THE SPECK

COULDNT GET THE NAME THE SPECK OUT OF MY HEAD
AFTER A FLASH
I CHOSE MY CODENAME TO BE
SPECKTATER
AKA
THE SPECK

WHY

I DIG THE NAME FOR A FEW REASONS
TATE
MY NAME TATE IS TUCKED IN THERE
SPECK TATE R
A SPECK IS WHAT I CAN BECOME
AND A SPECTATOR IS WHAT I AM
OR WHAT IVE WOUND UP AS

WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN A COUCH POTATO LIKE ME CAN SHRINK
A SPECKTATER


TO BE CONTINUED
COPYRIGHT 2009 HAFJAK DIVIZ
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED


Thursday, December 24, 2009

OPRAH BY HAFJAK DIVIZ



WELCOME TO HAFJAKS MANIPULATIVE MENAGERIE
OF STALKER STANZAS AND PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE POETRY
THIS POEM IS SUPPOSED TO MAKE YOU THINK IM A NICE GUY
READ ON AND SNEER AT THIS TRANSPARENT ATTEMPT
TO GAIN YOUR SYMPATHY ENTITLED

OPRAH







I WAKE UP
SHES CRYING
ITS PAST MIDNIGHT
THE ROOM IS DARK
ONLY ILLUMINATED
BY THE SHIFTING LIGHT OF THE TELEVISION

SHES NOT BAWLING
JUST LEAKING
AS ONE DOES WHEN TOUCHED BY TV

IT WAS A SNIFFLE THAT WOKE ME
YOU OKAY I ASK

I CANT REMEMBER HER EXACT WORDS
ONLY THE GIST OF THEM

SHE EXPLAINED THAT DR PHIL WAS ON OPRAH
TALKING ABOUT MARRIAGE
HOW ONES SPOUSE
SHOULD BE ONES SAFE PLACE TO LAND

SHOULD NOT BE YET ANOTHER COLD CRUEL AGENT
OF THE BIG BAD WORLD
BUT SHOULD BE A REFUGE FROM IT
WARM LOVING ARMS
AN OASIS
A NEST
A HOME

GUILT OOZED FROM MY GLANDS
HAD I BEEN A SAFE PLACE

ALSO DISCUSSED BY DOC PHIL AND THE OPER
WAS THE FACT THAT MARRIAGE
WAS NOT JUST SOME LEGAL BINDING OR INCORPORATION OF ASSETS
BUT WAS THE GRADUATION FROM ONE FAMILY
TO THE ESTABLISHMENT OF ANOTHER

AS ONES PARENTS PASSED
ONES SIBLINGS MOVED ON
ONES CHILDREN GREW UP
AND ONES FRIENDS CAME AND WENT
THERE WOULD REMAIN
ONES SPOUSE
THROUGH IT ALL
TO TAKE CARE OF ONE
FOREVER

SHE COMPLETED HER EXPLANATION
PEEKED OVER AT ME
LOOKING SMALL AND WEARY
WAITING TO SEE IF I AGREED WITH DOC PHILS
THEORIES ON MATRIMONY

IN A MARRIAGE
THERE ARE MANY TIMES WHEN YOU FIND YOURSELF
BACK ON THE ALTAR
GAZING AT YOUR BETROTHED
REPEATING VOWS AND PROMISING TO KEEP THEM

AGAIN THAT NIGHT
I SAID
I DO






FOR THE LOVELY ZANA
FOR WHOM I CANNOT WRITE ENOUGH POEMS
BUT I HAVE A LIFETIME TO TRY

JUST LIKE RON AND NANCY

COPYRIGHT 2009 HAFJAK DIVIZ



THE YELLING BY HAFJAK DIVIZ



PARTNER POEM TO SUNNY VOICE








I REMEMBER THE YELLING
RECALL ABSORBING IT MOST IN THE CAR

THOSE FRIGHTENING VIBRATIONS

MOST TIMES
THEY WERENT DIRECTED AT ME
I WAS JUST A WITNESS

THE YELLING
IT WAS LOUD AND DAMNING

THERE WERE PAUSES OF SILENCE
MADE ME SWEAT
WAITING FOR THE YELLING TO ERUPT AGAIN

I WOULD LOOK DOWN
AT MY HANDS
FOCUS ON THEM SO HARD
GET DIZZY

WHEN WOULD THE VIOLENT NOISE
DEGENERATE INTO PLAIN VIOLENCE

WINDOWS WERE UP
NO AC
HOT IN THE CAR
OUR CAR
OUR LITTLE BUBBLE
FILLED WITH NOISE
NOONE ELSE ON THE FWY KNEW OR COULD HEAR

SOMETIMES I WOULD PEEK UP
QUICKLY LEST I BECOME A TARGET
AND SEE ALL OUR HEADS DOWN
CHINS ON CHESTS
EYES ON LAPS
HANDS OPEN
PALMS UP

WE WERE ALL WAITING
JUST WAITING
FOR THE YELLING TO END
FOR THE YELLING TO DISSIPATE AWAY
LIKE THE STINK OF FECES IN THE RESTROOM

NEAR OUR DESTINATION
THE YELLING WOULD END
JOKES WOULD COME THEN
FUNNY VOICES
CUES THAT THE YELLING WAS OVER
AND WE COULD UNCOIL
FROM OUR PROTECTIVE STANCES

WE WOULD LIFT OUR HEADS
OUR EYES WOULD STARE FORWARD
FAR UP THE ROAD
BUT OUR HEARTS REMAIN IN THEIR DEFENSIVE POSES
BRACED FOR THE NEXT BATCH OF YELLING

I WONDER
WHAT WOULD HAVE RESULTED
NOT JUST THEN
BUT FOR AN ENTIRE LIFETIME SINCE
IF
DURING THE YELLING
I HAD CRACKED A JOKE
OR YELLED BACK
THREW A PUNCH
DID SOMETHING
BESIDE HIDE
WAIT
TOLERATE
MAKE EXCUSES FOR THE YELLING

IM STILL HIDING
WAITING TOLERATING SELF BLAMING
MAKING EXCUSES FOR THE YELLING

SMALL SWEATING AND SCARED
IN MY SAFETY

COWARD

EVEN MORE COWARDLY
IM YELLING NOW

WHEN I CATCH MYSELF IN THE ACT
I STOP
GET DOWN ON MY KNEE
MAKE MYSELF REAL SMALL
AND I APOLOGIZE AND EXPLAIN

BECAUSE I KNOW ABOUT THE YELLING
ITS LOUD
AND IT ECHOES






OH POOR HAFJAK
YOU HEARD SOME YELLING HUH
YOU POOR THING

AT LEAST YOU NEVER STARVED
I WAS BEATEN DAILY
I WAS SPAT ON J--ZED ON
I WAS MOLESTED AND RAPED
I WAS MURDERED
I JOINED A GANG

OKAY

GOOD

WRITE YOUR OWN POEMS

JAK
OVER AND
OFF

COPYRIGHT 2009 HAFJAK DIVIZ



FROST AND MIKO 27

Thank you for clicking onto the Ganerda's Business Blog!

Enjoy this week's Frost & Miko, and Happy Holidays from all of us here at Ganerda's Business! Well--Happy Holidays from me. It's only just me really.

Ganerda Grul
Librarian and Publisher
www.ganerda.com



...To be continued next week!
www.ganerda.com

TALKING TO SELF IN CARS OR DRIVEN TO DELICACY BY HAFJAK DIVIZ



BEEN DRIVING A LONG TIME
IN ONE OF THE DRIVING CAPITOLS OF THE WORLD
IN THAT TIME IVE NOTICED THAT
PEOPLE HAVE THEIR DRIVING RITUALS

LIKE ONE TIME
NEAR SANTA MONICA AND SAWTELLE
GETTING ONTO THE 405
I NEARLY CRASHED WATCHING THIS WOMAN
IN HER CAR HER BUBBLE
INDULGING HER DRIVING RITUAL
WHICH WAS
PICKING HER NOSE

BUT SHE DIDNT JUST PICK
SHE PLUNGED
HER FINGER GLIDED TWO KNUCKLES DEEP UP HER NOSE
SHE PULLED OUT THE GLISTENING DIGIT
EXAMINED IT
AND WHATEVER CAME OUT WITH IT
THEN SHE SUCKED THE FINGER
LIKE IT WAS GREASY FROM A PIECE OF KENTUCKY FRIED

YEAH

SHE PLUNGED AND SUCKED LIKE THAT
NOT JUST ONCE
BUT FOR THE ENTIRE TIME
I WAS ABLE TO WATCH HER
AS WE DROVE SIDE BY SIDE ON THE 405

ISNT SHE EMBARRASSED I THOUGHT
DOESNT SHE KNOW THAT SHE CAN BE SEEN
THAT IM WATCHING HER
OR IS SHE IN SUCH BLISS THAT
SHE DOESNT CARE

I CARE
IM TERRIBLY SELF CONSCIOUS OF MY DRIVING RITUAL
WHICH IS
PICKING MY NOSE

NAH

ME
I GET IN MY CAR
START THE ENGINE
PULL OUT INTO TRAFFIC
AND AS MY CAR SPEWS SMOG
I BLOW HOT AIR

THATS IT
MY DRIVING RITUAL
I TALK TO MYSELF IN THE CAR

WHAT DO I SAY

A LOT

A LOT I SHOULD NEVER SAY
A LOT ID LIKE TO SAY
A LOT I SHOULDVE SAID
A LOT

WHEN IM ROLLING IM OK
NOONE CAN SEE ME AT MY RITUAL
EVERYONES WATCHING THE ROAD

BUT RED LIGHTS ARE THE WORST
I COME TO A STOP
AND AM SPOTTED JABBERING TO MYSELF
AND HAVE TO PRETEND THAT IM SINGING
ON A HANDS FREE
OR COUGHING
OR I JUST COVER MY MOUTH WITH A HAND
AND JABBER ON

YEP
BEEN TALKING TO MYSELF IN CARS
FOR AS LONG AS IVE BEEN DRIVING

THE TALKING HAS TURNED INTO
PLANS IVE EXECUTED
SONGS IVE COMPOSED
STORIES IVE WRITTEN
COMICS IVE DRAWN
AND THIS AND OTHER POEMS

THE TALKING HAS LED TO WONDERFUL IDEAS
HAS FREED ME OF ANGER
GRANTED ME INNER PEACE

SO I DONT KNOW WHY IM SO SELF CONSCIOUS
ABOUT MY DRIVING RITUAL
ESPECIALLY WHEN SO MANY OTHERS DO IT

MAYBE IF I SPOKE INTO A MINI TAPE RECORDER
ID FEEL MORE LEGIT
MAYBE IF I STUCK A BLUETOOTH UHURA THING IN MY EAR
ID FEEL WELL DISGUISED
MAYBE IF I SPOKE TO OTHERS AND NOT TO MYSELF IN CARS
ID BE HEALTHY

WHO KNOWS

I ONLY KNOW THAT
TRAFFIC IS MY FRIEND
MY THERAPIST MY MUSE
MY SOUNDING BOARD
MY SOLACE

WHILE DRIVING I TALK TO MYSELF
I PLUNGE DEEP INTO MY PSYCHE
SOMETIMES THIS RESULTS IN EMBARRASSMENT
OTHER TIMES I PULL OUT GLISTENING DELICACIES
AND THEYRE FINGER LICKIN GOOD

JAK
OVER AND
OFF

COPYRIGHT 2009 HAFJAK DIVIZ


Sunday, December 20, 2009

SUNNY VOICE








HAFJAK DIVIZ







VOICE IN MY HEAD

ITS ALWAYS THERE

GENTLE AND SUNNY

I PICK SOMETHING HEAVY UP
CARRY IT WHERE IT NEEDS TO GO
VOICE SAYS
LOOK HOW STRONG YOU ARE
AND I FEEL STRONG

I LOOK IN THE MIRROR
SEE A PIG READY FOR LUAU
VOICE SAYS
LOOK HOW HANDSOME YOU ARE
SMILE
WITH TEETH
AND I SMILE WITH TEETH

I GET DOWN ON MYSELF OTHERS
WHINE COMPLAIN
VOICE SAYS
CHEER UP
AT LEAST YOURE NOT MR X Y OR Z
COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS
I AGREE
COUNT EM

SOMEONES AN AHOLE TO ME
WANNA GIVE IT BACK
VOICE SAYS
PERSONS IN PAIN
LASHING OUT
LASH BACK
ITLL BE LASHING EVER AFTER
SEEK TO UNDERSTAND
AND I SEEK

SUNNY VOICE
RISES ON MY NIGHTTIME MIND
WARMS OUT THE COLD
SHINES ON BEAUTY AND FORTUNE

VOICE IS MINE NOW
GIVEN TO ME
BY A FACE WITH PERCEPTIVE EYES
MINDFUL MOUTH
HALO OF GOLDEN LOCKS

WHEN THE FACE IS GONE
VOICE SHALL REMAIN
NOONE CAN SILENCE IT
IT IS THE GREATEST GIFT GRANTED TO ME
I WILL PASS IT ON
IT WILL BE PASSED ON AGAIN
IT WILL EVER SHINE






CALL YOUR MOM










Thursday, December 17, 2009

FROST AND MIKO 26

Happy Saturday and thank you for clicking into the Ganerda's Business blog! My name is Ganerda Grul, librarian and publisher.

I would like to wish you the very best of holidays this year! I hope this holiday is very light for you. May every meal be a delicious and healthy salad, and every present be cash or a giftcard! Instead of packing on holiday pounds, I hope you're taking a nice walk in the crisp weather and drinking lots of fresh water. Come on, folks! The holidays don't have to be a heart attack disguised in holly and dreidels! Happy holidays--Let's go windsurfing!

Enjoy the new Frost & Miko from 1996! And remember: Be a hog and your veins will clog, so eat that fiber and you won't have to wipe her!

Eeyew. Sorry. That HAFJAK is rubbing off on me.

Happy Holidays?

Ganerda Grul
Librarian and Publisher
www.ganerda.com



...To be continued next week!
www.ganerda.com

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

FROST AND MIKO 25

Thank you for clicking into the Ganerda's Business blog!

It has been very cold here in the city, and I welcome it. I still remember the sweltering sweating nights of summer and am grateful for the chill.

The most fun things for me to do during winter is breaking out all my coats, sweaters and accessories, the warm clothes I leer at during summer, then laying them out on my bed and concocting many layer combinations. These I mentally list, and I am fashionably prepped for the next winter's day!

And winter cuisine, what a treat! It has been soup and sandwich night all week at our home. My preferred soup and sandwich combination is a spicy tomato bisque and avocado, swiss and tomato on easy bread(Ezekiel bread).

I love winter, and I love Frost & Miko. I hope you love them, too. Below is this week's installment. Please enjoy it, and thank you for your time and interest.

Ganerda Grul
Librarian and Publisher
www.ganerda.com



...To be continued next week!
www.ganerda.com

Friday, December 4, 2009

FROST AND MIKO 24

Happy Friday Folks, and thank you for clicking into the Ganerda's Business blog!

Well, it looks like Frost & Miko's Hollywood nightmare is over, and they are onto their next adventure. Read on and enjoy!

Thank you for your time and interest,

Ganerda Grul
Librarian and Publisher
www.ganerda.com



...To be continued next week!
www.ganerda.com

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

FROST AND MIKO 23

Thank you for clicking onto the Ganerda's Business blog!

Ganerda Grul here. I hope that you had a splendid holiday and are refreshed and happy to be back to the grind. Here is some Frost & Miko for you!

Thank you for your time and interest,

Ganerda Grul
Librarian and Publisher
www.ganerda.com



...To be continued this week!
www.ganerda.com